Perfect Melancholy

October 11, 2004

Mood: Wistful/Sad
Song: ?????? (You decide, I'm too exhausted today)

This weekend, to put it mildly, has been horrific. Things turned out as I imagined they might…in my nightmares, that is.

I would put it more strongly, but somehow I am still a lady :).
Sunday it seemed like the entire world was crashing down on me, particularly after a friend of mine yelled at me after I had just spent the last 15 minutes on the longest crying jag I've had in quite some time. *sigh* We're still speaking, but the bonds of friendship have definitely been strained. Transparency hurts like all get out, and maybe that's why we so seldom practice it in our friendships. Also, note to self: weddings are STRESSFUL (my profound insight into the obvious today).

It's amazing what physical impact a fight can have. The gut twisting knot still hasn't gone away.

I could choose to use this as a forum to vent for a while, but I'll spare you (and myself) a rehashing of the details. Sometimes it's so hard to speak the truth anyway, knowing that the person will read into it exactly the opposite meaning as what you intended. I feel miserable, and I know she does too. I can regret how things turned out, but I can't take back what I've said. :*(. Sometimes there simply are no words.

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